Don’t Hurt Me Anymore
I can’t understand why,
The clock is ticking,
Even when I see your head tearing at the neck,
Reprimanding me over and over again,
I feel myself becoming less and less human,
And unable to escape it,
As if I’d done everything right but read the assignment wrong,
I give up on everything,
Your corrective red marks my face,
Letting the loser win,
And it smells like hate,
Letting the strong one take her place,
Smells regretful and still loving and innocent,
I beg someone to turn the page and force their understanding on me,
Cause I can hardly say I’m at my best,
And when it all reads like poetry,
I find myself misunderstanding where my reading fits,
Destroying happiness with my ignorance,
Then my cowardice,
Then my existence.
I want someone to give me the right,
The calming peace of mind,
To place myself somewhere unimaginable.
To call me the monster when demons run unafraid,
When bastards wait to behead the innocent,
Of the cowardly,
And the foolish,
Let me be the evil.
Don’t condemn me to victimhood.
Don’t let me be next on the chopping block,
I don’t deserve to find you wherever you’ve gone,
And the loving embrace of sleep doesn’t fit an unwanted like me.
So cut me off,
Make me your tumor,
Make me your every sin and slander,
Give me power,
Give me hate,
Give me every little thing to fill the hole,
Of the one and only thing I ever had,
Taken from my undeserving hands.
Give me hate,
Give me power,
Give me hate,
Give me power,
I want it,
Want it,
Want it,
So I can burn this whole world to the ground,
And just stop hurting,
Start belonging,
If those who open their arms have to die,
Let the executioners taste the same blade,
Let no one but the unwanted suffer another day.
Oh to the cowardly and the foolish,
Who deserve more than this world can give,
I will take your burden,
So close your eyes,
Just for me,
Until the suffering fades and fades and fades.